Decisions, Decisions

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bariatric, battle, beneficial, choices, diet, diets, eater, emotional, surgery, weight, weightloss

The Color Run was nearly 2 weeks ago, sadly I wasn’t able to partake because I came down with strep throat the day of. Go figure. It was a rough week that week and I ended up going to the emergency room on the 17th, the days after that I really don’t remember a lot of. Thankfully the strong antibiotics worked and I’m feeling a lot better now.

Getting healthy, including weight loss, is much more than a lifestyle change it’s also a journey. Let’s face it, none of us packed on all the extra pounds overnight so we know it’s definitely not coming off that way either.

Everyone’s journey is totally different too. We all have different reasons or issues as to why our weight has crept up on us over the years. For me, I have been overweight for as long as I can remember: obesity is rampant on both sides of my family, steroids to treat my asthma ran through my body for years, emotional eating, dealing with life via food, being teased for my weight – all of this contributed to being morbidly obese. I remember in the fifth grade kid’s saying, ‘Oh don’t make Karri mad, she’ll sit on you!!’ I can essentially tell you the moment it happened. Probably around my sophomore year of high school I dreamed about graduation day when I’d unzip my fat suit and reveal that my entire high school career was a major social experiment. I never did find that zipper…

Recently I attended an informational seminar for weight loss surgery. The surgeon said 98% of people that lose a significant amount of weight on their own, gain it back. (I don’t think he was simply blowing smoke to sell his practice either.) It’s true though, at this point, most of us are professionals at the weight loss cycle. But I filled out all the paperwork, my primary care physician faxed over the nutrition therapy stuff, and I’m going from there. I have my first appointment with the dietician in early September. I figure if my insurance covers it I’m going to go through with the surgery.

I started researching weight loss surgery my sophomore year of high school and never imagined I would actually have the opportunity to get it done. So after trying a zillion different diets, pills, making a pros/cons list, praying, discussing it with my family…I figure it’s the best option for me.

For me, weight loss surgery is a tool, it’s the stepping stone to a total lifestyle change and I am so ready to take that step. Now, believe me, it’s a major surgery and it is absolutely not for everyone. I’ve spent a long time researching it, watching videos, reading blogs, researching the surgeon, hospital, etc. So just make sure that if you’re considering weight loss surgery that you do your homework.

I’m going this route because I do love myself, I want a future, and I’m ready to take on the world. Make sure you love yourself no matter what you’re going through in life even if you’re struggling with your weight or whatever, you’re worth so much more than a silly number on a scale. You’re amazing. And you’re totally worth it.

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Beneficial

Tags

beneficial, crave, diet, eater, emotional, God, life, made, trigger, watchers, weight, weightloss

There are so many things in life that are beneficial for us but all we really need is Christ. Doesn’t seem that complicated does it? But why oh why do we make it so dang complicated?! Human nature I suppose.

I had a rather beneficial weekend, not in terms of food (although I was on track with my Weight Watchers points). Friday was rather mundane, took a painkiller for the pinched nerve and called it a night relatively early. Saturday I texted my ex (as we have been talking again) to wish him a happy birthday, he responded and was nice…..a little too nice. So I lurked on his Facebook page to find posts from his new girlfriend. I immediately logged off Facebook and deleted him out of my phone. It was probably the most beneficial thing I could have done all weekend!

That simple task of deleting him made me decide to partake in a “color” 5k in August, create a gym schedule for the week, buy/wear red lipstick (talk about empowering!), and just really made me recommit to living life. I felt so incredibly empowered after doing it, I was on some sort of emotional high the rest of the weekend.

Know what else is beneficial? Going to the gym. I did around noon today, I didn’t want to because it felt like my head was going to explode but I got on my gym clothes, laced up my hot pink shoes and hopped onto the treadmill. I didn’t go fast or far but I did it. When I wanted to quit because my legs were burning I prayed, then attempted to hide the dance moves I was doing while listening to “Single Ladies” on my iPod (why the heck are there SO many mirrors at the gym?!?!?). Dear guy in front of me, sorry to had to be witness to my terrible Beyonce moves…actually no I’m not 🙂 I felt amazing after getting done with my workout. Tomorrow I’m hoping to add on 5 more minutes on the treadmill.

I’m trying to set small goals for myself so it doesn’t seem so daunting. First goal – not being an emotional train wreck. I know it’s easier said than done especially when you’re an emotional eater such as myself. Before I reach for those snacks or anything like that I’m going to pray. Pray for strength, clarity, and for God to shove me in the direction HE wants me to go. I’m not saying it’s going to be easy but it’s a start. I’m hoping that by not being an emotional train wreck this will chill out the emotional triggers.

I struggle with triggers. Moods, people, moments, memories it’s very overwhelming sometimes but that’s okay. Another goal of mine this week is to determine what my triggers truly are. Perhaps by identifying them I can overcome it. We’ll see how things go.