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It was brought up in a local weight loss surgery group that someone received a candy bar from a friend that knew their struggles and about their bariatric surgery. I’m sure she didn’t down the candy bar but it made me think about how life post-surgery means you absolutely have to be your own advocate because people often don’t understand the surgery, the process, how your body even works now.

Being my own advocate isn’t something that is easy or even comes natural for me. A couple of months ago before going to a concert while we were still dating (before actually a couple?) LR and I went out to dinner with his friend and date. It was a cute little Italian restaurant in the Detroit area. LR and I waited to order until everyone was there so I had plenty of time to look over the menu. My heart was racing, palms were sweaty and I was literally fighting back tears. The only thing I could eat was a roasted chicken meal that could likely feed a small village as it was half of a chicken then a bunch of sides (I don’t remember which). So while everyone else at the table ordered these super delicious sounding pizzas, I ordered a salad. Turns out that salad came with creamy dressing and fatty salami. I ate a little bit, maybe 5 bites, and spent the rest of the time pushing the food around my plate while everyone was gushing over how awesome the food was. Inside I was beyond frustrated and holding back the tears.

We go to the concert, which was amazing until I started feeling off. I immediately walked towards the back of the venue (away from the stage) into the bathroom where I nearly passed out. I recovered and went back out to LR who was waiting for me. At this point my lips were tingly, I was light headed, and on the verge of passing out again. We ended up leaving early and I felt HORRIBLY guilty. I felt as though I ruined his night.

Life post surgery means we have to be our own advocates, it wasn’t anyone’s responsibility but my own to make sure I ate properly. I didn’t want to inconvenience anyone at the table while I substituted this or that or special ordered my meal. But you know what, I have to. It doesn’t matter who I’m inconveniencing because this is my life. I nearly passed out from my own stupidity – talk about a lesson learned. We have to be our own advocates.

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